Within this week, its become known though that Kolya really likes buckwheat. This was the only other grain apart from rice, which he didn't reject.
We took quite a few walks around the muswell hill neighbourhood. Although at most times he was too weak to even walk, the fresh air, especially of the Highgate/Queens woods must have been helping.
I have not felt this much love for him...ever, it seems. When your child is so weak, you feel helpless. You stay with him through this awful mess of sleepless nights and cramps, and tears. You somehow remove yourself and only when you come out do you realize what it all means. And what it means is that there should simply be an absolute gratitude to God, this universe that apart from this week, some other times in his short but vibrant life, Kolya has been well. He has been healthy. And I am so grateful for this gift. God bless our children, for they are all we really have.
